Blood.

(As the closest I’m going to come to acknowledging Talk Like a Pirate Day, I’m going to talk about blood.)

I had to have a 2 hour glucose tolerance test this morning. This involves a 12 hour fast, then taking some blood, then drinking some glucose drink, then coming back at 1 hour and 2 hours later to have some more blood drawn. Since that meant 14 hours between meals, and not being able to go to work in between the 0, 1 and 2 hour blood draws, I was anxious to get it over early as possible.

In the shower this morning, I suddenly realized that the order for the blood draw was still on my desk at work, where I’d had it when I’d phoned to make the reservations. Which meant I had to get cracking immediately to drive all the way to work, grab the paper and get back to the blood place (which I’d chosen specifically because it was close to home, not close to work).

I got to the blood place as soon as it opened, only to find a long line-up of retirees. God only knows why the geezers need to be there first thing in the morning – it’s not as if they need to get anywhere. And even though I’d booked an appointment, the phlebotimist took everybody in order, so it was almost exactly 8am for the first draw.

Then I had to find a wifi connection. The Pittsford Public Library wasn’t open yet, but I could recieve the wifi in the parking lot. Unfortunately it requried a password. I drove around a little trying to find an open node with public parking, and finally found it in the Starbucks parking lot, parked beside a gigantic SUV that was well over the line and with lots of scrapes on the side. So I decided to stay in the car to do my surfing so I could watch “Miss I’m Too Fucking Entitled To Care About Who I Damage With My Wasteful Behemoth” squeeze into her monster truck and back out in case she decided to add some more scrapes to the collection.

When I got back to the blood shop, there were more old farts ahead of me in line, but the technician took me immediately because it was my time. But I thought the guy who was first in line was either going to punch me or have a stroke he was so mad that I went ahead of him.

After that, it was just after 9 so the library was open, so I went back there. And discovered that the userid and password here so obvious I should have guessed it.

When I went back for my 10am blood draw, there wasn’t a soul in the place except the phlebotimist (hey, I got to use that word again!) and the UPS driver and me. So we talked a bit about flying – he is or was a member of the Williamson Sodus Flying Club – until he finished filling about 8 vacutainers of my blood, and then more geezers showed up.